River of Crisom Tears
by Kumiko Nakashima
Summary: After Jien ran away he left Gojyo behind not knowing that his mother was still alive. These are their last moments togetherm oneshot Read and review


A.N. : I don't own Saiyuki, and I couldn't find Gojyos stepmothers name, so if someone knows it could you tell me? This is my first Saiyuki fan-fic so be nice! Read and review!

River of Crisom Tears

She lay surrounded by her own blood, feeling weak as more started to add, encircling her in a bath of blood. She knew that she was dying, but couldn't figure out how. _/This pain is bearable compared to the pain that my stepson forced me to endure…him and his half-blood. My husband loved his mistress with so much passion that he never showed me, and when his mistress died I was to raise her son, like it was an honor to raise that half-breed…maybe if he was a full demon I wouldn't of cared, buthe wasn't . He was a child of Taboo and because of him I was ridicule, made fun of because I was forced to raise him./ _She was then jolted from her thoughts as she looked up and saw her son, her true son, holding a bloodied sword in his now bloodied hands. Tears ran down his face, and regret shown in his eyes, as he looked at his mother's body then at his brother, before turning and walking away, leaving his sword on the ground. _/My son, what have you done? Why have you chosen your half-brother over me, your own mother? Why would you leave me here? Did you love your brother more then me...just as your father loved the woman that gave him Sha Gojyo you both left me for someone who is of no real worth./ _

"Mother, I'm sorry." Gojyo whispered brokenly as he moved closer to the only mother that he could remember. "I never meant to hurt you…I loved you, you're the only mother that I can remember. I never wanted to make you hate me." He murmured grief stricken, his hands shaking as he picked her limp up and brought her to her bed and laid her down. No longer able to support himself he fell to his knees beside the bed, and lowered his head in shame. "I know that you hate me…I realize this now, but I can't help but care for you. You're my mother…and I'm sorry for whatever I did to make you hate me." Gojyo cried as he sobbed over the body of his mother, who was just clinging to life. Gojyo finally felt as though he could tell his mother the truth about why he never could hate her. "I know that you never wanted me here with you, and I should hate you because of what you have done to me. Now though, I just can't hate you, I love you as a son loves his mother. If I could die so you could live without the tears, and pain I would. Gojyo whispered heartbroken wiping his eyes he looked at his mother, and in the depths of his crisom eyes she finally saw the child that he was, and not he monster she had thought he was. "It was okay if my death would have allowed you to live freely, and today I thought that you were crying and then I looked up and the tears won't yours but my brothers…and it's my fault, I've caused so many tears." Gojyo said sounding so resigned and hurt. Standing up, his hands still shook slightly, and his eyes seemed to have dulled a bit. In only minutes Gojyo seemed to age beyond his childish years, to an adult with burdens too heavy to carry alone. Turning Gojyo walked from the room and refused to look back.

Gojyos mother allowed her tears to fall one last time, as the pain faded to numbness. _/I've finally realized, I've been lying to myself. It's true that I didn't care for my stepson because he was of mixed parentage, and that is part of the reason why I hated him. Though I cried simply because I couldn't stand to look at him and know that he represented all the love my husband had for another, the loyalty and caring that that I thought would never come to me. Until today, until I looked into my sons eyes, and in those depths I knew that I had made a mistake. / _She closed her eyes and the tears stopped, as she remembered her sons…both of them. "I'm sorry for everything…forgive me."

Okay that's it folks…read and review!


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